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Sometimes reality is better than fiction and poker is no exception. Some of you have enjoyed my stories from various poker exploits in the past and today I present three new stories.

This time I share a couple of funny, yet true stories from the Bike in Los Angeles and my personal experience with sexism in online poker from people who think I’m a woman. (You’re going to have to continue reading to find out.)

He Didn’t Deserve to Cash in the Tournament

Many of you that have never played in live poker tournaments have never had the joy of going through a bubble negotiation. In some smaller live tournaments, sometimes there is a negotiation at the bubble where players agree to take some money off the top spots and pay another spot to avoid hand-for-hand play.

Everyone must agree and in most cases players are agreeable. However, there are occasionally those few that want to be jerks and not pay. We had one such player in a PL Hold’em tournament I was playing in a few years ago at the Bicycle Casino.

We were at the bubble and the uber short stack had maybe 2 big blinds at most. The chip leader wouldn’t agree to the deal, stating “that person only has two big blinds. They don’t deserve to make the money.”

Sure enough, that person was all-in within a couple of hands and busted. Most everyone in the tournament thought the chip leader was an ass and immediately went out of their way to target him. He ended up finishing like 17th or 16th.

Just after the chip leader busted, the bubble boy returned to the tournament area and was talking with the Tournament Director. Suddenly, the TD started laughing and shook the guy’s hand before he left.

After the guy departed, the TD got on the microphone and told us how that the guy left the tournament after bubbling and entered a NL $500 game. About 20 minutes into the game, he had the losing end of a $250,000 bad beat jackpot. Getting half of the jackpot, he received $125,000.

The top prize for the tournament was somewhere in the neighborhood of $25,000. The bubble boy had returned to thank the guy for being an asshole and to flash his winnings. The TD summed it up nicely, “That was nice bubble prize dont’cha think?”


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I’ll Buy His Dr. Pepper

If you haven’t figured it out from some of my stories, I used to play a lot at the Bicycle Casino, so much so that all I had to do was wave at a porter and they knew I wanted a Dr. Pepper. (They didn’t serve Dr. Pepper so a porter had to go get one from the gift shop and you had to pay for it.)

Anyway, a porter was bringing a Dr. Pepper back to me one day during a NL tournament and a guy walks up and tell me that he wants to pay for my soda. The porter takes his money quickly and goes off. I’m a bit confused, thank him and probably gave him a strange look as to say “why the heck did you do that?”

He looks at me and asks, “You don’t remember me do you?” Nope. He proceeds to tell me that I had knocked him out of a NL tournament about three days ago and that he cussed me and walked off.

I was getting ready to speak and he says “I just wanted to apologize for that. After I left, I went to have dinner and met this gorgeous woman and we hit it off. I ended up getting laid that night, so if you hadn’t knocked me out, I wouldn’t have met her. So the least I can do is buy you a soda.”

I get ready to speak again and he say, “You’re welcome” and walks off. A couple of guys at the table are looking at me amused but they got a better laugh afterwards.

I didn’t play in that NL tournament he spoke of. I was playing Stud Hi-Lo at Hawaiian Gardens that day. But thanks for the Dr. Pepper dude!

Sexism Isn’t Just in Live Poker

Sexism in poker is a hot button topic in poker and all of us have seen it at one time or another. It is not just a live poker issue, you get the same types of jerks online as well. Several years ago, I made my avatar on PokerStars the picture of New Zealand actress Emma Lahana. For those of you that don’t know who she is, she played Jennifer on Haven and was Kira Ford on Power Rangers Dino Thunder.

Anyway, after putting her picture as my avatar, I would get hit on by certain male players on occasion. Everything from the relatively harmless comment about how pretty my picture was to the crude “how much for a lapdance honey” comments.

There are times where players have changed how they play against me based on my picture and one of the funniest came in a $5 Sit & Go that I played on the site prior to Black Friday. This one guy was impressed at how I was going deep because “women don’t know how to play tournaments.”

He was convinced that he could “teach me how to play like a man” and we could “work out an arrangement.” I kid you not. Anyway, one of the other players tried to clue him in that I was “probably a dude” but the sexist player wouldn’t listen.

Later on, I doubled through Mr. Sexism and he started going off about how that “no woman is going to beat me in this game” and kept saying “c’mon bitch, shove.” After a few minutes of this, I pick up pocket kings against him and I go ahead and put him all-in. He calls with A-8.

A king on the flop leaves him drawing dead and he is cussing a blue streak in the observer chat. Afterwards, I calmly say. “Btw, I am a guy.” This got plenty of lols from the remaining players and one guy said, “prove to me you’re a guy and I’ll send you $20.” I told him to message me on AIM at the same nick I was using on PokerStars and a minute or so later, I got a message request.

I then took a quick pic with a piece of papers saying “<—- Compncards” and sent it to him. Sure enough, he sent me $20 on PokerStars.

I also finished 2nd in the SNG, so that was a profitable game.


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James Guill

James Guill began his poker career in 2006, spending two years traveling the US tournament circuit. Since 2008, he has covered the game extensively for some of the biggest names in the industry. When not writing about the latest poker news, he can be found hunting for antique treasures in Central Virginia.