What’s going on guys? My name is Joey Ingram – also known as Chicago Joey – and I’m here for PokerUpdate.com doing an as-yet-untitled series where I’m going to be telling some adventures from my experiences in the poker world. I’ve been playing poker for about eight years now, and I also do a podcast series called the PokerLife. The guys over at PokerUpdate proposed an idea that I tell some stories, have some fun and so here I am!
Shoutout to my boy Robbie!
A Lucky Fish Sends Joey on Life Tilt
I’m going to talk about a guy who…when I think about him I get angry. When I hear his name, I used to want to bash myself in the head with a baseball bat – or bash him in the head with a baseball bat.
But now that I think about him in retrospect, I actually have very fond memories of destroying him at the higher stakes games. This was a young gentleman by the name of Youseff Ahmed, who I met while I was living in Canada – I met him at the $2/4 min-stakes PLO games on PokerStars – and there was this random account that showed up out of nowhere, playing this terribly un-optimal style, and just wouldn’t lose.
At this time you could check people’s results on something called TableRatings. If you put his name in there his graph just went up. But he played this really unorthodox, weird, style and everyone was asking “Is this guy a cheater?” People were making posts on the forums asking “Youseff Ahmed, who is this guy? Is this a bot?” Stuff like that.
This guy terrorized my life for a good five or six months at the tables.
I made blog posts, made posts on my Twitter, on twoplustwo – I made all these posts saying I don’t know who this guy is, you shouldn’t play with him, he’s clearly a cheater with some kind of rigged account. I don’t know if he works for PokerStars but I want to f***ing kill this guy.
“One of us is Going to Die”
He lived in Sydney, Australia, and I ended up moving out to Sydney a couple months later.
Once again, he started terrorizing me at the tables – just destroying me. So in the chat, I would type to him “Let’s meet up right now, one of us is going to die. Like, let’s f***ing end this right now.”
And of course, as you might imagine he was sort of hesitant to meet up with me in Australia. I guess typically if someone was threatening me at the tables…now, I’m not saying this would have happened but at that time in my life, I can’t say for sure either way what would have happened.
When Fish Don’t Even Realize They Are Fish
Then, what happened was he started moving up playing less mid-stakes, playing more $10/20 and $25/50. At those stakes, the rungood that he was having playing his un-optimal style – actually he switched to a more optimal style – and I started destroying him, and he actually lost a bunch of money playing his optimal style.
Then he tried to go back to his original style – which was calling in weird spots and doing these terrible things – and that wasn’t working for him either. Poor Youseff Ahmed, I don’t think he’s been seen for a while at the poker tables.
Returning Fish to their Natural Habitat – Busto
I guess the moral of this first story I’m telling you guys is that if there is someone out there that you really hate – someone out there who just f*** with you so hard – and sometimes you are going to want to punch that motherf***er in the face, going to want to kill him – don’t kill him, don’t do that. That’s a bad thing; you might get in trouble, you might go to jail, or something bad might happen to you.
But, know in the end that all you have to do is just move up stakes with him, and at some point and time you will get your victory. You will get your glory. You will get your vengeance on him. Youseff Ahmed if you are out there… Got love for you Papi.