If there’s one thing that stands out, or rather up, about Doug Polk, it is his hair. Poker fans love to give him grief over his crazy hair, so much so that he regularly self-needles himself on YouTube.
There are many theories as to how Polk is able to manage that crazy hair of his but there are some that are completely off the wall. Today we present 5 of the craziest theories about Doug Polk’s hair.
He’s the Son of The Doctor
The Doctor has always been known for his outlandish style and the Tenth Doctor was no exception. One of his trademarks was his hair that seems to defy gravity and has a “wibbly wobbly timey wimey” mind of its own.
We already know that the Tenth Doctor has a daughter, but one has to wonder if maybe he also had a son. Sons like to take after their dads, so that could explain the hair. Hey, it wouldn’t be the craziest thing we’ve seen from the Whoverse.
Special Hair Gel Developed by S.H.I.E.L.D.
Not only does Doug Polk’s hair defy gravity but also there are rumors that it may even have super powers. How did his hair gain super powers? According to our “sources,” Polk agreed to become a special operative with S.H.I.E.L.D. a few years back and rumor has it he has conducted covert ops for the organization from time to time.
Part of his payment is a special hair gel that gives his hair super powers. One time a tournament director went to try to muss up Polk’s hand and the TD wound up breaking six bones in his hand.
When in the field, Polk is known simply as “The Do.”
He’s Secretly Vanessa Selbst’s Brother
In a recent video posted to YouTube, Polk revealed that he received a Cease and Desist email from Vanessa Selbst over claims that he is stealing her hairdo. Other reports indicate there is more to this story.
Polk’s hairstyle isn’t manmade but rather genetic and he and Vanessa Selbst are actually brother and sister. If so, there may be an argument that poker talent runs in the family – along with crazy hair.
It’s a Wig
Some of you may remember a prior episode of PolkerNews where Doug changed his hairstyle a couple of times. Some of those looked a bit…odd and we may have an answer to this.
One source close to the cousin of a reputable source revealed that Doug Polk is actually bald, as in Lex Luthor style bald. His crazy hairstyle is actually a wig that he wears on a weekly basis. Apparently, the high stakes pro shelled out some serious coin to get a realistic looking wig and he used some of the “cheapies” in that video a couple of months ago for the different hairstyles.
Doug Polk is a Jedi!!!
Hair like Polk’s doesn’t seem humanly possible and it may well not be. Any believer in The Force knows that it can shape and mold all things, including hair. If Yoda can do crazy acrobatics and lift X-Wings, then Doug Polk can manipulate his hair.
What that also means is that DOUG POLK IS A F***ING JEDI!!! No wonder he is always winning at high stakes poker. He is Jedi mind tricking these pool fools through the internet and taking their money.
How do we know he is a Jedi and not a Sith? This is poker folks. If he were a Sith, he’d be force choking fools that bad beat him left and right. Besides, Chris Ferguson has already locked up the roll of poker’s Darth Vader.